我討厭低潮時候的自己。人總是這樣，憂鬱久了，連為什麼不快樂都已忘卻，只是變成了一種習慣。早上起床就戴上臭臉，似乎和刷牙洗臉一樣的順理成章。

我喜歡按時去划龍舟，曬得比菲律賓人還黑。喜歡背著相機到山裡，海邊拍照。喜歡開著車大聲唱歌，找尋我沒去過的地方。找朋友一起看球。

可是我把時間都花在憂鬱上。什麼都不想面對，什麼也不想做。朋友也不想見。最近和這樣的自己很熟。這個我早晚黏著，煩到想趕出家門，或是自己離家出走。但是不論我去到哪，我還是跟著我。

溪谷中穿出紅木林，為天撢去塵埃


浩浩蕩蕩的幡旗


夾雜著戴洋帽的小女孩


和忘了戴紅帽的聖誕老公公


配合海螺的旋律


與印地安納瓊斯的鑼聲同步


跟隨高舉布幡的小男孩朝聖


不論是穿著 Baby Gap 坐旋轉木馬


還是虔誠的膜拜


在莊嚴的屋宇下


有難解的咒語環繞


蝴蝶翩翩


或是清脆鈴響，皆為假象


有如風吹不響的風鈴


如不染雜塵的開悟


宛若堅木的心智


由於魯鈍如鎧甲的業律


就算讀盡天下經書


也不一定明白


亦未必能夠綻放


結出果實

---

接下來掰不下去了，漢式觀音


這是度母


也是度母


這是不是度母

夏日溪邊
妳俯拾起我　掌中把玩
想伏貼在妳口袋裡
用觸覺導熱　分享一個體溫
讓妳帶我走

腦海　總在遇見妳的前一秒
才有詩句揚帆
睜眼時　反覆徒勞　尋找
猶如　攀藤欲於落地窗上爬行
連放索社的壁虎都訕笑出聲
沒有詩句　沒有妳　唯留擱淺思潮

像隨手撿起般　輕易地拋
著地時我以為會碎裂
卻只是缺了一角
遍地鵝卵　尖銳的我不合群

傍晚溪中
過往月光伏貼妳的背上
縱使不經意撈起月亮
對妳　不過拋棄顆大石頭

Wouldn't it be nice if we were younger?
Then we wouldn't have to wait so long.
And wouldn't it be nice to live together?
In the kind of world where we belong.

You know its gonna make it that much better,
When we can say goodnight and stay together.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could wake up
In the morning when the day is new.
And after having spent the day together
Hold each other close the whole night through.

Happy times together we'd been spending.
I wish that time with you was neverending.
Oh Wouldn't it be nice?

提出一時讓人難以反駁的想法，
大家就會虛偽的稱呼這個人是天才。

過了不久找到了反例，
眾人又會咒罵這個人是白痴。

不同意嗎？那你一定覺得這句話很白痴吧，天才？

於是我們又錯過
迷失在這一道，或下一道河灣

峽谷兩岸，懸滿了晾衣線
掛勾，顫抖，濕透的墨
欲滴而下的污水，低聲哼著
曲，未曾聽懂

留在溪石上的皮肉
和被魚吸食的傷口
已結出同樣堅硬的鱗片

武裝得像隻蝸牛，那就讓我啟程
準備好，再次邂逅

"I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" - My Chemical RomanceWell if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say.
I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
For all the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor?

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
(I'm not okay)
I told you time and time again you sing the words but don't know what it means
(I'm not okay)
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time take a good hard look!

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

Forget about the dirty looks
The photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book, but the pages are all torn and frayed

I'm okay
I'm okay!
I'm okay, now
(I'm okay, now)

But you really need to listen to me
Because I'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust Me)

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay

(Okay)

即說咒曰趕羚踏馬的枝擺羊三遍

朋友們問，你還好嗎？
我除了笑，什麼也不說。

我當然還好，只不過是
回家時，
把租片放進了冷凍庫。
冰淇淋丟入了垃圾桶，
紙屑挖到碗裡，
看著 no disc 的畫面坐了半個小時。

我就是這樣，每個環節都錯了。

I was here
You were there
Guess we never could agree
While the sun shines on you
I need some love to rain on me

我不希望妳覺得和我聊天是一個妳應付的責任。
我盼望妳是真心想和我分享妳一天的心情，讓我為妳分擔一些心事。
因為這樣會讓我知道妳希望我在妳的生命中。

如果妳不想要我扮演這個角色，請讓我明白。

還是，我已經該明白了？